Australiana food

Major retailers tend to assume everyone hosts a massive nationalist fiesta on Australia Day rather than just enjoying a day off work (which is arguably more Aussie). Should you be taking this opportunity to host a picnic, a barbecue or other party on Saturday, here are some true-blue products to buy.



Many ordinary products are getting rebranded with flag motifs to cash in on the day. MasterFoods tomato sauce is now MasterFoods Australian Grown Tomato Sauce in a blue bottle with a red lid. It's currently $2 at Coles (save 99c). Also at Coles, Campbell's Chunky Fully Loaded canned soup has an "Aussie Lamb Casserole" variety with pasta for $2 (save $1.29), and you can get Edgell Aussie-branded canned corn kernels and sliced beetroot for $1 a can (save 49c).

Other quintessentially Australian foodstuffs are also on special at Coles. A twin pack of Twinings Australian Afternoon Tea (that's 200 teabags) is $15 (save $4.99). Excellent value if you drink a lot of tea, and this is a nice variety.

As a treat to have with your Aussie tea, why not pick up some Unibic Anzac Biscuits for $2 (save 95c), a six-pack of Coles Bakery Australia Day Donuts (lemon icing; green sprinkles) for $2, or Coles Lamington Fingers for $1.99 (half price; save $2).

Planning on making a pav? Coles Bakery Pavlovas are currently $7 each (save $2.25), but this is just the meringue shell; you have to add your own cream and fruit.

How about a Chiko Roll? At Woolworths you can get 2 packs for $7 (save $2.38) – that's eight Chiko Rolls to get your fish'n'chippery nostalgia engines revving. Motorbike optional.



And I don't know about you, but there's nothing more old-school Aussie than a platter of kabana and cubed cheese. Head to the deli at Coles, where Don Kabana is $12/kg (save $3.39/kg), while Cracker Barrel Gold Release Cheddar (fancy stuff covered in wax) is $20/kg (save $10/kg). (FYI: toothpicks are $1.63 for 200, and cocktail onions can be had from $1.19.)

Since Victorians are jocularly known as Mexicans, why not have an Australia Day spread including Aldi chicken enchiladas ($5.49 for two) and Tabasco sauce ($1.99).

And on behalf of the Croweaters amongst us, I am pleased to learn that Aldi is selling Coopers Pale Ale six-packs for $12.99. This is great value, considering they're $14.99 at Dan Murphy's.

Australiana paraphernalia

As 26 January approaches, the shops become full of distressing nationalist tat. If you must buy this seasonal stuff, here's where to get it cheaply.

At Aldi you can get giant Aussie flags, just the right size for wearing as a cape (sigh), for a mere $3.99. For the same price Aldi also has coloured face paint, and those obnoxious padded top hats in either green and gold or an Aussie flag design.

They also have T-shirts and singlets for men, women ($4.99) and children ($3.99). Some are more tasteful and subtle than others (one says "Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi!!"; another one says "Young Hot and AUSSIE"). The kids' ones are actually the cutest – you could mistake them for ordinary surfwear tees.

If you're after some Australiana swimwear, Big Dubs has flag-print men's board shorts for $9.94, and girls' or boys' board shorts for $8.92. As with Aldi, the kids' ones are the least obnoxious – I especially like the boys' shorts, which have an abstract flag pattern in red, white and blue rather than the depressing navy-with-the-Union-Jack-and-stars that's par for the course in nationalist apparel.




Big Dubs' women's swimwear is a little better than your bog-standard triangle bikinis – a cute bandeau bikini with halter tie and a red ruffle decoration is $14.98. The pants are plain navy with red ties; the Southern Cross is emblazoned on the left boob. For the less exhibitionist, but at the same price, there's a rash vest and a navy halter-neck 'tankini' with the Aussie flag across the right hip.

Aldi is boasting that its thongs – either ladies' sizes in an Aussie flag design or unisex in plain black – are 15% cheaper than last year. They're $1.69.

Aldi also has Aussie flag beach towels for $8.99, and Aussie flag beach chairs for $9.99. But at Big Dubs, similar chairs are just $7.88.

Oh god, where does the Aldi merch stop! Australia Day golf umbrellas for $7.99! Stubby holders! Picnic rugs! Big Dubs also has a ridiculous thong-shaped inflatable pool toy for $10, and to mitigate against road-rage incidents by bogans, an Aussie flag for your car for $2.



But if you're planning a more tasteful and less jingoistic public holiday, perhaps Aldi's four-person wicker picnic basket set is for you. It's one of those nice ones with a gingham lining, leatherette straps and an insulated cooler section. It includes four sets of stainless-steel knives, forks and spoons; four melamine plates; four plastic wine glasses; four cotton napkins; and a bottle opener (IMPORTANT). All for $49.99.